For the Church Signs

  1. best mathematical equation
                 1 cross  +3 nails =  4 given

  2. “If you are ugly with sin, you need a faith lift”

  3. The Work of the church is to produce spiritual fruit

    not religious nuts.

  4.  10 Commmandments  “For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets.”

  5.   Don’t fear tomorrow.  God is already there. 

  6. “No God—No Peace.    Know God—Know Peace.”

  7.     B. I. B. L. E.   Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.

  8.  “Free Trip to heaven.   Details Inside!”

  9. P = Pray 

    U = Until 

    S = Something 

    H = Happens .  

  10. A clear conscience makes a soft pillow.

  11. Give God what's right -- not what's left.

  12. Man's way leads to a hopeless end -- God's way leads to an  endless hope.

  13. A lot of kneeling will keep you in good standing.

  14. He who kneels before God can stand before anyone 

  15. What part of "THOU SHALT NOT" don't you understand? 

  16. In the sentence of life, the devil may be a comma--but never let him be the period

  17. Don't put a question mark where God puts a period

  18. Are you wrinkled with burden? Come to the church for a face-lift

  19. When praying, don't give God instructions - just report for duty

  20. Don't wait for six strong men to take you to church

  21. We don't change God's message -- His message changes us

  22. The church is prayer-conditioned

  23. When God ordains, He sustains

  24. WARNING: Exposure to the Son may prevent burning

  25. Plan ahead -- It wasn't raining when Noah built the ark

  26. Most people want to serve God, but only in an advisory position

  27. Suffering from truth decay? Brush up on your Bible

  28. Exercise daily -- walk with the Lord

  29. Never give the devil a ride -- he will always want to drive

  30. Nothing else ruins the truth like stretching it

  31. Compassion is difficult to give away because it keeps coming back

  32. He who angers you controls you

  33. Worry is the darkroom in which negatives can develop

  34. Give Satan an inch & he'll be a ruler.

  35. Be ye fishers of men -- you catch them & He'll clean them.

  36. God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.

  37. The wages of sin is death. Repent before payday! 

  38. It's hard to stumble when you're on your knees. 

  39. Never give the devil a ride. He will always want to drive! 

  40. Don't let the littleness in others bring out the littleness in you.

  41. God answers knee-mail.

  42.  “Try our Sundays.   They are better than Dairy Queen.”

  43.   “People are like tea bags—you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are.”

  44.  It is impossible to defeat a fool in an argument.

  45.  “Come in this Sunday. Beat the Christmas rush!”

  46.   “When down in the mouth, remember Jonah. He came out all right.”

  47. Think about how others should behave and then act that way.

  48.  “Sign broken. Message inside this Sunday.

  49. The world needs more warm hearts and fewer hot heads!

  50.  “Fight truth decay—study the Bible daily.”

  51. God never alters the robe of righeousness to fit the man, but the man to fit the robe.

  52.   “How will you spend eternity—Smoking or Non-smoking?”

  53. True happiness comes not from having much to live on, but having much to live for!

  54.   “Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives”:

  55. Success in Marriage is more than finding the person. It is Being the right person.

  56.   “Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world.”

  57. You need the Church. The Church needs You.     The world needs both

  58.  “Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church.”

  59. Strangers are just friends waiting to happen.

  60.  “If you’re headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns.”

  61. A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.

  62. “If you don’t like the way you were born, try being born again.”

  63. Friends are the Bacon Bits in the Salad Bowl of Life.

  64. “Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon.”

  65. Have you read my #1 best seller? There will be a test. --God

  66. “This is a ch_ _ ch. What is missing?” -----> (U R)

  67. Christian Friends are God's way of taking care of us.

  68. Come early for a back seat.

  69. Friendship is one mind in two bodies. - Mencius

  70. Best vitamin for Christians   B1

  71. Our Sundays are Better than Dairy Queen's.

  72. You are not too bad to come in church / not to good to stay out.

  73. Try Jesus. If you don't like Him the Devil will always take you back.

  74. Aspire to Inspire

  75. Inspiration without Perspiration brings Frustration

  76. When entering eternity will you be in the smoking or nonsmoking section.

  77. Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited Until you try to sit in their pews.

  78. Stop, Drop, and Roll won't work in Hell.

  79. Be ye fishers of men. You catch 'em - He'll clean 'em.

  80. Don't let your worries get the best of you; Remember, Moses started out as a basket case.

  81. The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, But mosquitoes come close.

  82. Many folks want to serve God, But only as advisers.

  83. Some minds are like concrete Thoroughly mixed up and permanently set

  84. We're called to be witnesses, not lawyers or Judges.

  85. He who angers you, controls you!

  86. Don't put a question mark where God put a period.

  87. Don't wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.

  88. God grades on the cross, not the curve.

  89. Forbidden fruits create many jams.

  90. Don't gripe about your church;  If it was perfect, you couldn't belong.

  91. The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us.

  92. Opportunity may knock once,  But temptation bangs on the front door forever.

  93. When you get to your wit's end, You'll find God lives there.

  94. If God is your Co-pilot, swap seats!

  95. The Will of God never takes you to where the
    Grace of God will not protect you.

  96. God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.

  97. God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.

  98. Prayer:   Don't give God instructions, just report for!  duty

  99. We don't change the message, The message changes us.

  100. There is no greater treasure than a good friend

  101. Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain

  102. It is easier to preach ten sermons Than it is to live one.

 God’s billboards

 Imagine these Billboards on Rt. 30 Bypass

Let's meet at my house Sunday before the game.  -God

C'mon over and bring the kids   -God

What part of "Thou Shalt Not..." didn't you understand?-God

We need to talk.     -God

Keep using my name in vain, I'll make rush hour longer. -God

Loved the wedding, invite me to the marriage.  -God

That "Love Thy Neighbor" thing... I meant it.   -God

I love you and you and you and you and...   -God

Will the road you're on get you to my place?   -God

Follow me.      -God

Big bang theory, you've got to be kidding.    -God

 My way is the highway.     -God

 Need directions?      -God

You think it's hot here?     -God

Have you read my #1 best seller?   There will be a test.  -God

Don't make me come down there.  -God