Bible Riddles Church Humor
Should you find yourself the victim of other people's bitterness, ignorance, smallness or insecurities;
Remember, things could be worse. You could be them!!!!
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Agnostic is a Greek term meaning / without knowledge. An atheist complained to a friend, Christians have their special holidays, such as Christmas and Easter; Jewish folks celebrate their holidays, such as Passover and Yom Kippur; Muslims have their holidays. EVERY religion has it’s holidays. But we agnostics, he said, have no recognized national holidays. It’s unfair discrimination!” His friend replied, Well...Why don’t you celebrate April first? |
...Trust in yourself and you are doomed to disappointment;
trust in money and you may have it taken from you;
but trust in God, and you are never to be (disappointed) in time or eternity.
Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever. Isn't that cheery?
Two buffalo were grazing on the grassy plains when a carload of passing tourists stopped to watch.
Said the driver, Those are the mangiest, ugliest, most moth-eaten miserable beasts I have ever seen. ...
One of the buffalo turned to the other and said: "I think I just heard a discouraging word."
Random thoughts on exercise
I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks. Haven't lost a pound. Apparently the gimmick is you have to show up.
I have to exercise in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm
doing.
I don't exercise at all. If God meant us to touch our toes, he would have
put them further up our body.
I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 89
now, and we don't know where in the world she is.
The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.
If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.